Folly [O]

[Ray Juris]

It was vastly uncomfortable being outside without so much as one historical text on his being. Ray adjusted his tie and brushed down his vest as he strode outside, feeling somewhat unsteady over it. To Ray, being without a book to drown in was being without a security blanket and that was just a foolish thing for him to do.

The man knew he needed to keep up appearances so none of his students could call him weak. Ray scowled in disgust at how juvenile that thought sounded just moments after he had it. No, Ray wasn't insecure like children and he damn well wouldn't tolerate thinking like them. He needed to keep up appearances so he could remain professional.

The man tucked a lock of purple hair behind his ear as he continued forth into the gardens. It was hard not to appreciate the beautiful lush plant-life after being cooped up inside all day, yet Ray was still considerably distracted. Students were such a hassle some days and the teacher often thought about how they weren't working as hard as they should have.

Dead students. It was unsettling no matter how you looked at it as far as Ray was concerned, but he tried not to blame the students themselves. No the Elegies were the ones who had gotten those dead souls into this mess and they knew exactly what it was they were getting themselves into when they did it.

It was a disgrace to the first Great Mages. Ray only hoped that the Elegies' sin wouldn't carry on to their descendants once they passed. Hoping of course that their skills were passed on as they had been for generations. The shattering of the crystal and the nature of the sin committed concerned the history teacher. It was usually after something as radical as what had been happening in Symphony that the natural order of things began to change.

"I feel it will be a year for the history books," Ray muttered to himself thoughtfully. It wasn't just every day that you realized your lifetime would be crucial in the books of the future. All one could do was pray that it wouldn't be a terrible history, but a one of inspiration instead. "Still though I doubt there is a way to paint them in a positive light. Disrupting the world as they did."

"History couldn't have possibly let this many strong warriors vanish from their home worlds so easily. Makes you wonder what could possible be going on where they came from. Perhaps it's all going to hell there too."

[Astraea Selah]

There was an almost constant feeling on anxiety whenever Astraea was out these days. The woman didn't like leaving her home for anything, but she still had work with do with the Sanctuary and it was really starting to wear her down. After attending what she needed to she found herself wandering the gardens once more, which was starting to become a bit of a habit. When she could Astraea would even try to conduct whatever business she could in the gardens.

The last time that the woman was there though was when she was speaking with the twin muses about their progress. Those children were always so peculiar, but at least they still found time to actually be children. Astraea wondered idly what a normal childhood would be like, wishing that everyone within Symphony could actually experience that without worry. Though that was Astraea's wish most people would still probably think she was doing horrible things to the city.

Astraea didn't think those summoned by the Requiem's were bad, but so many people disagreed. It was hard to keep doing what she was doing because it led to those innocent students getting hassled. Many of the people that Astraea introduced to Sanctuary seemed so utterly lost though sometimes she felt like it might not be good for them on other levels. The woman continued to battle her uncertainty as she made her way back towards the school.

The woman stopped in her tracks when she caught sight of one of the professors heading her way. Juris, she believed his name was. As far as Astraea knew he was the most devoted history teacher out of the bunch, seemingly to really take a fondness for history in general. The only thing about the man that she heard bad things about was his attitude. Some students felt like he was too harsh about his lessons, which could be very good for them or very bad.

"Hello Mister Juris. I haven't seen you in a while," Astraea started formally. Not only was it just a good idea to be formal with him in particular it was common between the Elegies and the staff at Sanctuary. Astraea always tried to remain formal with everyone though so she didn't cross any of the wrong lines. It was hard to tell who liked her and who hated her these days. Sparse on the liking of course. "How are you doing today?" The Elegy would ask to be polite, but would try not to let the conversation drag.

Surely Juris had something better to do than converse with someone such as Astraea.

[Ray Juris]

It wasn't uncommon for Ray to lose himself in his thoughts and this time wasn't any different. Already he was trying to form theories that could possibly explain the flux of warriors. The historian still didn't believe that all such heroes could have died, many in their prime, in their own worlds. There simply must be something behind this. I can't believe that the Elegies happened upon a... a gold-rush of dead heroes.

The sounds of someone approaching snapped Ray from his musing, a term he'd grown fond of applying considering he was no muse. Catching only the slightest glimpse of pink hair, Ray was easily able to identify who it was that walked up before he even heard her say a word. Astraea was the kind of woman you couldn't mentally avoid even if she tried to keep to the shadows quite so often.

Astraea's voice was as delicate and formal as ever. The way that she always remained so distant only managed to remind Ray that he held a certain contempt for her. Elegies had meddled where they shouldn't have and of course had to deal with the consequences of their actions. Pure intention or no, the Elegies had disrupted the natural order and possibly threw off the course of the world. Time would tell.

"Yes it has been quite some time ma'am," Ray's tone was mostly flat. Twinges of guilt did pluck at the corners of his mind, but Ray knew that he could not bend where it concerned Astraea. If he were to do such a thing then surely he could get himself into trouble along with the Elegies and that wasn't something he intended to do.

A beat pause before Ray continued, "I am quite well. Caught up with my studies as always, trying to have a little jaunt around the school to clear my head a little. After all, if you just sit and study for too long you won't absorb all the information. I'm not the type of man to waste my time in such a manner." The idle banter was probably more than was obligated to answer such a question, but it didn't really matter.

Astraea would most likely make some excuse soon as to why she needed to leave and then Ray could get back to his walk alone. "What about yourself Miss Selah?"

[Astraea Selah]

It was a little off putting that Ray was exactly as Astraea thought he would be. Of course he hadn't been outwardly harsh, but there was something about the man that seemed utterly stern and oppressive. Formalities aside she imagined he wouldn't even waste his time being polite with her. Despite the difference in ranking many members of the Sanctuary didn't offer her the niceties she was receiving with this professor so she supposed that she should have been more appreciative.

'Ma'am. Yes I suppose that is quite a kind thing for someone to say considering.' The thought floated there for a moment before she could entirely focus on what Ray was saying. As the word said, Ray was indeed a very dedicated man who cared more for his studies than the normal person. Astraea could understand that consuming thirst for understanding, for knowledge. When she was young she often felt the same about many things.

That was quite some time ago though. "It is very good to hear you are well. You are quite correct about needing breaks during study though. Too much focus and the material can't quite hold. Just a complexity of the human mind I suppose. But as for myself I am fine." As much as she wanted to end the conversation there she felt an unexplained guilt for thinking such a thing.

The sensation of guilt was strong enough to hold the Elegy in her place and instead of saying she must be on her way she muttered, "Been talking a walk to clear my mind. There is much to do and I fear I don't have the capabilities to handle it all on my own." Hearing the words she had just said, Astraea felt a complete embarrassment. It was rare that she ever admitted to herself that she was feeling overwhelmed, let alone anyone else.

"I-I apologize. That was unprofessional of me," Astraea felt a light flush rising to her cheeks. The feelings that were keeping here there had subsided, or at least were being overwhelmed by her embarrassment, so she was quickly backpedaling to find a way out of the conversation. "I am sure you have things on your mind. I won't bother you any longer. Have a good day Mister Juris."

With a slight bow of her head she quickly began to walk around the man, fully intending to leave without another word passed between them.

[Ray Juris]

For but a moment there was a feeling that a connection had been made with the woman that everyone proclaimed so distant. It perplexed Ray to catch that split second feeling, but he tried to dismiss it without further thought. Even if the man was convinced that meddling in Astraea's life was a bad plan he still had a hard time containing his curiosity. The look on her face or the sound of her voice as she formally continued the conversation was plucking at Ray's mind.

"...I fear I don't have the capabilities..."

The words caught the historian's attention in startling fashion. It was clear that the Elegy herself was rather embarrassed about blurting out such a thing, but Ray didn't care for that as much as he cared about the twinges of guilt he was feeling. Something akin to how he felt for certain students, the man almost thought that perhaps he wanted to help the Elegy. How he would/could accomplish such a thing was a headache just to ponder though.

"No need for apologies," Ray started slowly before Astraea continued. Her blush and the frantic way she quickly tried to end their conversation was too much for Ray to handle. It probably wouldn't be as helpful as it was with his students, but the man didn't much care because he was already entwined in the emotions that set him on his rants when students were around. The types of rants that were only started when someone around him had done something Ray didn't agree with in the slightest.

Turning to address the woman who was trying so hard to just leave, Ray scowled. "Wait one moment Miss Selah. Any decent person might try to console you and since I'm not going to perhaps that makes me a bad one, but there are certain things you need to hear. So many people are positioned against you, a fact which you must know all too well, and you are obligated to do your job through it all." The man started sternly, with one of his signature scolding voices.

"Being obligated doesn't mean you have to be emotionless though. Not that I'm asking you to spill your emotional vomit all over me, I'm a horrible person to do that with, but you can't pretend you're a complete stone. That's Lady Stone's job, isn't it?" Though he fully intended to continue lecturing in the best way he knew how he ended up sounding somewhat soft by the end. Frustrating as it was, it might have been just what the woman needed. Ray hated being a pillar of strength when he didn't need to be.

[Astraea Selah]

The woman found it harder than she could have expected to keep a straight face when Ray asked her to wait. It was not only rare for someone to actually stop her from leaving, but seemed doubly so considering just who it was doing it. The way in which Ray spoke to her left Astraea utterly speechless and stunned. Of course it wasn't the fact that he began to scold that stunned her so much as when his tone seemed to change a little. It didn't matter that she only just really met the man, she still knew something was amiss with the way he faltered.

Astraea crossed her arms somewhat insecurely, still facing away from the Composer thankfully. 'Emotional... vomit?' Her brow furrowed as she thought about that exactly that would be like. There were many things she worked on making sure she didn't feel, but what she did was often too much to hold in. It was why she had just said what she did to someone like Ray and probably why he was speaking to her the way he was. 'Sounds almost as if he is being kind. Perhaps he is mistaken or... forgot who it is he is speaking to.'

Either way, the concept of what she was hearing perplexed her. Someone stood before her and actually spoke of how she didn't need to be emotionless. Needless to say it wasn't something she had considered since she was rather young. There were many things that she needed to do as a leader of the city and no one could understand just what that did to a person. Especially since she was no longer called a mage, but rather a necromancer. Not many people had any form of kindness in them for the Elegies.

"I'm afraid you have the wrong idea Mister Juris," Astraea started flatly. As much as she wished that she could go back to being a normal girl with emotions and the ability to have fun she knew just how damaging that would be in her current position. "I don't intend to... let my work suffer for personal matters." She spoke the words but didn't know if she entirely believed them herself. Up until this point she had tried very hard to keep emotional matters out of things because she was a leader and had very important things to tend to.

Now Astraea tried to remain emotionally neutral because it would do her no good to let the things people were saying about her destroy her. Seeing a defeated leader could have upset some of the few people in the city that might have still had some respect for her and for the ones who didn't it could have just validated some of the foul things they were saying. "Being emotional in any sense would not do me any good. Of course I will have my weak moments as you may already understand, but if I were to change the way I'm handling matters..."

"I cannot expect anyone to understand what it means to be a leader of the city during times as harsh as these. Nor can I make people understand the motivation behind what I and the others did. All I know is how to continue trying my best for the city and perhaps someday I can redeem myself," The Elegy felt her heart aching a little at her own words. It was probably crazy to assume she could ever receive redemption, but it was said those without a dream died a little each day.